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Last weekend I experienced a relapse of Ulcerative Colits. The flair-up started off with my eating some dal and feeling very wiped out afterwards. I spelt for a hour and had a horrible burning feeling in my stomach. A few hours later I started getting pains in my abdomen every 5 minutes, each attack lasting for about 30 seconds. Nothing new, I'd been through all this before.

This kind of pain is very debilitating. It destroyed all my imputus to do anything. Why start doing something, if 4 minutes later you'll be floored by an attack of pain? Result: two days of sitting around feeling sorry for my state of existence, chanting inattentively, reading inattentively and observing maya working herself into my consciousness.

Relief came after two days of fasting. The pain subsided into merely an uncomfortable tightening sensation and I could (kind-of) eat fruit and get some (little) energy that. The body is an amazing machine when it works, but very bothersome when it doesn't. And, more often then now, it doesn't.

As much as a release that pain is merely a temporary manifestation of my mind to let me know that something in the body is going wrong, still I find my consciousness very severely affected by it. Anyway, good practice for the time of death.

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